Sorry, this is why you did not get a Valentine’s gift this year
I mean it. In a world where Valentine’s Day has become so commercialized and can only be seen through the prism of cakes, gifts and roses., if you haven’t received any of these by now, you only have yourself to blame.
No one likes you. Probably because your attitude is bad and your behaviour is even worse.
Now I don’t care about your excuses; your significant other is far away or nonexistent, you don’t believe in celebrating Valentine’s Day, you don’t really know that many people and the like. If by this time of the day, no one has sent you something, I am here to tell you that something is wrong with you.
The one day in the year where it is allowed and encouraged for anyone to express their undying love and affection for you in gift form and they haven’t done so yet and you think all is well with you?
Don’t be fooled by all those who have been wishing you ‘Happy Valentine’s Day’ by mouth; if they haven’t sent a gift, any gift, they are lying.
If they cannot be swayed by retailers, big and small, who are trying to ram down overpriced and unneeded gift items down their throats, then they don’t like you at all.
Let me break it to you again if it hasn’t sunk in already. Nobody likes you; that’s why.
Oh, you thought everyone loves you? Sit down pleaseBut it is not too late for you; too late for this year but not too late for your life. You can still change it all and expect to receive many Valentine gifts next year and in the future.
Change your attitude, treat people better and make better friends. Pretty easy, right?
Actually, that wouldn’t really work. You see, no one actually knows what possesses people to like you enough to buy you Valentine gifts. I, for one, hope to never know; hope to never love someone that deeply that it would be more beneficial to donate my brain to surgery than to partake in Valentine shenanigans.
If people can complain that Christmas and other public festivals are now over commercialized, that the baseless festival that has become Valentine’s Day has long gone past that point.
It has now become a fetish, to be brandished once a year as a totem of our undying and too readily purchased love.
All is not lost, though. We can still fight this impeding scourge. Stand strong and resist the urge to dress in red and white and restrict our gift-giving to just one day.
We are more than those that are against us, than those who are easily swayed by corporate interests and commercialism.
Even if no one likes us. Even if there are no Valentine gifts to keep us warm in the night.